From the sheriff's blotter in the Cañon City Daily Record.
¶ Colo. 115, Brookside, report of over 30 goats in the road. Goats fled the scene before deputy arrived.
¶ Colo. 115/Mackenzie, Cañon
City, reporting party called to advise that a subject wearing a mask and
dressed in black ran across the highway and into a building. Deputies
checked the area with negative contact.
(Always black in these reports. At least if "subject" wore orange, he might be a prison escapee. The only building there is the ruined Fawn Hollow Tavern, which was a "bucket of blood" roadhouse in the 1940s–1950s.)
¶ U.S. 50, Cañon City, reporting
party requested assistance in retrieving her husband from his
girlfriend's residence. Deputy advised the parties to work it out, as
the husband wouldn't come out until the wife left the area.
¶ 1500 block Chestnut, Cañon
City, reporting party complained that the neighbor's cat had been
leaving presents in her yard. Deputy said he would contact the neighbor
and warn the cat.
There was also an actual bank robbery where some 19-year-old robbed a bank in the town where he lived without even bothering to put on a mask. He was quickly caught.